My first job in Egypt I had a coworker named Ahmed.
One day I was fixing him tea.
I asked him if he wanted any sugar with his drink.
His response?
“Yes, but only five spoons, please.”
Only five spoons of sugar?
Um…..what?
….
While Ahmed might be an extreme example, it’s a fact that Egyptians like sugar in their drinks.
At least way more than you probably do.
Whether it’s their tea like Ahmed, a coffee at the awhwuh, or a fruit juice that’s ALREADY overly sweet, it’s completely common in Egypt to add one (or five) packets of sugar.
Is every Egyptian in the world like that?
Of course not.
At Cleo Lingo we don’t like generalizations.
We do, however, like to tell the truth.
And the truth is this: if you’re a foreigner in Egypt, the cultural norms of “sugary drinks” might take some getting used to.
In that spirit, here are ten ways you can keep yourself safe.
…
- Run away. Seriously. Sitting down with a friend, and she just put some sugar in your coffee without asking? Get out of there as fast as you can.
- Pretend you’re diabetic and that sugar is a legitimate danger. Egyptians will nod sadly as they consume their sugary goodness without you.
- Laugh nervously and just don’t stop. Eventually, whoever you’re having tea with will become so uncomfortable that they walk away.
- Ignore all WhatsApp messages that suggest a “coffee date.” Ain’t nobody got time for that.
- Dump out whatever drink you suspect has too much sugar in it. Look deeply into the eyes of whoever happens to be there. This will get the point across.
- Act insane. Become so outraged when somebody asks you if you “want any sugar” that you literally start screaming. Scream in an imaginary language if you can. This will terrify everybody in the cafe, they will leave, and you will have your “normal sweetness” drink all to yourself.
- Stay in your room forever and refuse to make friends. Life outside in Cairo is too noisy anyway.
- Get a tattoo on your face that says مش عايز سكر (I don’t want sugar). Everybody will laugh at you, but hey, now your problem is solved.
- Never go to Egypt in the first place. What you don’t know can’t hurt you, right?
And our personal favorite?
- Go with the flow, let Egyptians do their thing, and appreciate the chance (for however long you are in Egypt) to experience a different cultural reality that you never knew existed.
…
Cleo Lingo suggests number 10.
Egypt is a weird place for a foreigner to be, but at the end of the day, Egyptians are just like anybody else: people trying to get by, looking forward to the weekend, and drinking (maybe overly sweet) coffee every Monday morning.
Don’t get on your high horse and start telling people to drink less sugar.
Just enjoy good friends, good tea when you can find it, and the adventure that Cairo brings.
After all, my grandma always told me: “In the land of sugar, bitter people will finally be sweet.”
Ok, that’s bullshit.
My grandma never said anything like that.
But hey, it sounded creative, and I’m currently on a sugar high. 🙂
